![\"IMG_3390](\"http:\/\/www.vbcpsblogs.com\/core\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/09\/IMG_3390-student-panel.jpg\")
<\/a>\u201cAlways respect your teachers,\u201d advised fellow panelist Luke. \u201cOne teacher of mine seemed scary at first, but she became my favorite teacher and still is. I wish she would move to eighth grade to teach.\u201d<\/p>\nWhat about changing clothes in the PE locker rooms?<\/p>\n
The panel of eighth graders empathized with the audience\u2019s concerns.<\/p>\n
\u201cJust do it fast,\u201d said one panelist.<\/p>\n
\u201cDon\u2019t look at anyone else,\u201d added another. \u201cJust look into your locker.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIf you don\u2019t want to change in front of others, you can go into a bathroom stall,\u201d shared a third student.<\/p>\n
\u201cAnd take your uniform home on the weekend and wash it.\u201d<\/p>\n
Someone emphasized deodorant and noted the availability of showers in the locker room.<\/p>\n
Being emphasized in the parent session down the hall were routine and structure. \u201cOutside of being a toddler, puberty is going to be the fastest growing time for them,\u201d said Jeff Hofmann, assistant principal at Salem Middle School.\u00a0\u00a0\u201cMiddle school should work like a routine, but they will need some time for freedom and independence to build parent trust.\u201d<\/p>\n
A parent expressed concern about how her son may handle his newfound freedom and independence at school.<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m concerned with all the time to change classes. My son is not concerned, but I am. How can I make sure he\u2019s not a drifter?\u201d she asked, noting she expects he\u2019ll want to spend time talking to seventh- and eighth-graders instead of getting to class.<\/p>\n
\u201cMiddle school is set up to have all the sixth-grade classes together, all the seventh-graders together and all the eighth-graders together,\u201d Hofmann explained. \u201cThe students move together in their teams, and teachers and staff are in the hall to help monitor. We see which students are \u2018exploring\u2019 on their own and get them to where they need to be.\u201d<\/p>\n
Another parent sought advice on how to maintain open lines of communication with her son. \u201cThey need their parents even more for guidance at this age. How do we keep the door open?\u201d she asked.<\/p>\n
\u201cDon\u2019t give up,\u201d responded Nichols. She offered suggestions she\u2019s known families use to encourage conversation.<\/p>\n
Set a special time to talk about the week. Use a notebook to write notes to each other because children may be embarrassed to talk about certain topics. Older siblings or a family member other than a parent can help broach topics. Nichols also encouraged working with guidance counselors at the school.<\/p>\n
Rephrasing questions can be helpful. Tolley said instead of asking, \u201cWhat\u2019s bothering you?\u201d ask, \u201cIf an alien spaceship landed tomorrow, who would you have the aliens remove from school.\u201d Sharing a personal story, Tolley noted her grandson more readily opened up with the second question to talk about what was troubling him.<\/p>\n Brandon Middle School guidance counselor Leigh Powell agreed with Tolley.<\/p>\n \u201cDirect questions are not good,\u201d she said. \u201cIt is normal for them to start pulling away, and boys are not always as verbal as girls. Some of the best times to talk are when you have them \u2018captive\u2019 in the car.\u00a0\u00a0Listen to them and ask questions.\u201d<\/p>\n The hour-long parent session addressed additional questions about the middle school zero bell, AlertNow text messages, school safety drills, bus transportation and altering class schedules. Panelists agreed that staying connected with the school is the key to success.<\/p>\n \u201cIf you have questions, please call the school,\u201d said Hofmann. He noted schools are often contacted after <\/em>matters have been festering for a while, and early communication to administrators or guidance counselors does help.<\/p>\n Hofmann advised checking Parent Portal regularly to review class grades and assignments, and help students stay organized by ensuring their binders and backpacks are free of loose papers that need to find a home.<\/p>\n \u201cPrevent the backpack black hole,\u201d Powell advised with a smile.<\/p>\n<\/a>Susan Tolley, retired educator and principal, suggested talking at dinner every night about the \u201crose and thorn of the day,\u201d or best and worst thing that happened. \u201cWhen they know it\u2019s expected, they\u2019ll share,\u201d she said.<\/p>\n